Victory Road IC Inbox

[pidge_out]

 


Hey, it's Pidge. Can't answer right now-- Rover quit it! --so leave a message and I'll get back to you when I can.
Rover, what did I say--?!?!

Comments

[pidge_out]

you also had things specially made

[Which is... super sweet. It's the kind of thing she knows to expect from Hunk, but this is Lance, and... She really does feel bad to have so little to give in return.]

i think matt's happy as long as you keep him caffeinated when he goes to work

and it definitely would've been worth 5 if you'd hidden the best coffee from your shop inside

[spacebaloney]

well i made myself one too so it's really not that big of a deal

[And it shouldn't be, but deep down it is. And Lance hates himself a little for it.]

i tried, but my shift manager is being a dick and not letting us take home the bags that are close to expiring anymore
i could dig them out of the dumpster but who wants dumpster coffee

[pidge_out]

[She will get to the bottom of this one day, Lance. Mark her words.]

did you really try to?! you know i was kidding, right??

[spacebaloney]

why wouldn't i?
what's the use of a cup if you don't have coffee to put in it
besides, if i bring the good stuff there's no way anybody else would bring that shack crap here

[pidge_out]

probably because that's technically stealing from your store? i mean you shouldn't waste coffee either, but you know what i mean

what shack crap?

[spacebaloney]

i was gonna pay for it, pidge
it's not stealing if i give them money for it
jeez oh ye of little faith

there's this guy who runs a coffee shop out of a train car he fixed up and it looks like shit and he keeps parking it in front of every starmiebucks he can find and stealing our customers

[pidge_out]

isn't the good stuff expensive?! you're already getting custom mugs for everyone!


oh

should we vandalize his train car, then?

[spacebaloney]

employee discounts comes through once again!

nah. vandalizing it would just make it more alluring
it looks like shit already so probably won't even make a difference you can see

[pidge_out]

you're truly a model employee

ok fine, no vandalizing, but we could sabotage it. if it's a train car then it's on a track, and i could probably put together something that'll control it remotely and make it go to the middle of nowhere

[spacebaloney]

pidge, i swear it's magic
it's a train car but it's not on a track
like i don't know how it works but he just rolls around in it like it's a regular car

[pidge_out]

even better! i could totally create some kind of remote control system for a thing that functions like a car

[spacebaloney]

s w e e t
maybe if he shows up tomorrow i'll text you to come and check out his claptrap of a coffeeshop
i'm telling you, pidge
i'm surprised the health department hasn't shut it down

[pidge_out]

perfect. let me know. :D

so wait, he just drives it around and parks it in front of cafes to steal customers??

[spacebaloney]

any starmiebucks he can find, he's out there
it's harassment, i tell ya!

[pidge_out]

then you've gotta launch into corporate warfare
and like i said, i'll totally help

[Pidge isn't actually sure if this is a Thing. Economics is not among her knowledge fortes. But it sounds like a Thing and honestly? She does like the idea of helping Lance rip someone a new one. Clearly being involved in a space war for so long has had a lasting influence.]

[spacebaloney]

[Economics isn't Lance's strong suit either. He's just here for the action. And to be honest, it feels nice that Pidge is so willing to help him go up against a coffee rival without much questioning of Lance's motives. It's no aliens or robeats, but something simple and dumb. He kind of didn't expect it.]

okay cool
i'll go track his movements
oh and you gotta watch out for his barista
it's this stupid emo coffin hipster fuck with a ton of hands

[pidge_out]

[What does Lance's reasoning here matter to her, really? The enemy of her friend is also her enemy, right?

Plus it just sounds fun.]

a ton of hands? Is it an alien like Slav?

[spacebaloney]

no, he's a pokemon
like you know those egyptian mummy coffins?
he looks like one of those, only he has more than two hands
he also has emo bangs

[pidge_out]

i'm gonna just take your word for it