[The fact that Pidge was starting to sound panicked also wasn't quite sinking in, yet.]
WHAT DO YOU MEAN 'WHEN'? He said something about a shield, and radiation, and protecting a planet... and then Allura, and saving her, but she saved him... I don't know. I think I kind of stopped processing the details after he said he DIED.
[She hesitates again, and there's a shuffling noise like she's finding a new spot to settle herself down into while she listens to him.]
I think... even if it was just me? I wouldn't tell anyone either.
[It's a quiet admission, equal parts ashamed and sad. How would she even bring something like that up? To Matt, her dad, Shiro or the others... She knows Keith and Lance's situation is different, but still.]
[Keith wasn't sure. Would he have backed down and trusted Lotor? He wanted to think he wouldn't have, but there was no real way of knowing. Shiro had trusted him... even if it turned out not to be their Shiro. But, they had all trusted Shiro, and Keith most of all. So, if Shiro had trusted Lotor, then Keith was pretty sure he would have eventually given in as well.]
And maybe... maybe I wouldn't have noticed, either.
[Which hurt like hell to admit, but Keith had to be honest with himself. He didn't have the relationship back home with Lance that he had here in the Fleet.]
Yeah... [She goes a bit quiet, taking a moment to herself to think. This must be why Lance has been so down lately. Pidge can understand this much. Maybe now he'll be less distant with her. Maybe.
She's hesitant to keep trying to bridge whatever gap has happened there. She shouldn't just assume that now everything is fixed and honky-dory and they can just go right back into their usual playful friendship.]
[That almost makes Pidge let out a laugh. Lance on the outside. That's rich. The very concept of it is strange and foreign to her. She just barely manages to hold it in, though. She can't go making things worse.]
(no subject)
Date: 2018-09-06 07:23 pm (UTC)He didn't die! Why the quiznak would you even think that??
(no subject)
Date: 2018-09-06 07:34 pm (UTC)[Did Keith sound panicked? Keith sounded panicked.]
(no subject)
Date: 2018-09-06 07:39 pm (UTC)He-- Wha-- When??
(no subject)
Date: 2018-09-06 07:41 pm (UTC)WHAT DO YOU MEAN 'WHEN'? He said something about a shield, and radiation, and protecting a planet... and then Allura, and saving her, but she saved him... I don't know. I think I kind of stopped processing the details after he said he DIED.
(no subject)
Date: 2018-09-06 07:46 pm (UTC)Lance died. Is that why he's been acting so strange since coming back to the Fleet?]
I.. didn't know. I didn't know, Keith.
(no subject)
Date: 2018-09-06 07:49 pm (UTC)He wouldn't tell me. Why didn't he want to tell me? I had to beg him to.
Why does this keep happening?
(no subject)
Date: 2018-09-06 08:13 pm (UTC)[There's a pause, and then finally-]
If you were the one who died, would you have told him right away?
(no subject)
Date: 2018-09-06 08:26 pm (UTC)I-...
[He wanted to believe he would..]
I want to say yes, because I want to believe that I'd be honest with him. But... I'm not so sure.
[He sniffed somewhat loudly.]
I mean... I get it... I don't handle stuff like that well. I'm trying. I just... [sigh]
I guess I wouldn't.
(no subject)
Date: 2018-09-06 09:50 pm (UTC)I think... even if it was just me? I wouldn't tell anyone either.
[It's a quiet admission, equal parts ashamed and sad. How would she even bring something like that up? To Matt, her dad, Shiro or the others... She knows Keith and Lance's situation is different, but still.]
(no subject)
Date: 2018-09-07 02:26 am (UTC)[He thought he was getting better...]
(no subject)
Date: 2018-09-07 05:53 am (UTC)[A beat while she frowns down at her communicator.]
...I had no idea. [Way to go, Pidge. Getting tons of these negative points for being a terrible friend.]
(no subject)
Date: 2018-09-08 05:07 am (UTC)I guess... maybe he just didn't tell anyone? I don't know... I don't know what was going on at the time. I wasn't there.
I should have been there.
(no subject)
Date: 2018-09-08 05:17 am (UTC)If you hadn't been doing what you were doing, we'd still be working with Lotor.
Besides, the rest of us were there and we clearly hadn't helped.
(no subject)
Date: 2018-09-08 05:32 am (UTC)[Keith wasn't sure. Would he have backed down and trusted Lotor? He wanted to think he wouldn't have, but there was no real way of knowing. Shiro had trusted him... even if it turned out not to be their Shiro. But, they had all trusted Shiro, and Keith most of all. So, if Shiro had trusted Lotor, then Keith was pretty sure he would have eventually given in as well.]
And maybe... maybe I wouldn't have noticed, either.
[Which hurt like hell to admit, but Keith had to be honest with himself. He didn't have the relationship back home with Lance that he had here in the Fleet.]
(no subject)
Date: 2018-09-09 03:16 am (UTC)She's hesitant to keep trying to bridge whatever gap has happened there. She shouldn't just assume that now everything is fixed and honky-dory and they can just go right back into their usual playful friendship.]
Well, at least he's told you now. So that's good.
(no subject)
Date: 2018-09-12 04:32 am (UTC)I guess.
[He sighed.]
Sorry. I shouldn't have yelled at you.
(no subject)
Date: 2018-09-13 08:13 am (UTC)[A beat, and then-]
Could you tell Lance I'm sorry for not noticing?
(no subject)
Date: 2018-09-19 07:55 pm (UTC)[Keith was quiet for a moment, and then nodded.]
Yeah... yeah, I can.
[But, before they disconnect...]
You should try to talk to him. He feels like he's on the outside. He needs to know the team still wants him around.
(no subject)
Date: 2018-09-20 10:58 am (UTC)Yeah, maybe. I'll try.
[She won't.]
In the meantime... Just take care of him, okay?
(no subject)
Date: 2018-09-20 07:06 pm (UTC)[He hoped she would...]
Yeah... yeah, of course.
(no subject)
Date: 2018-09-20 07:50 pm (UTC)I'll... talk to you later, okay?
(no subject)
Date: 2018-09-20 09:01 pm (UTC)[Keith had some emotions to go deal with now... and a Shiro to talk to.]